Yep, you've heard about it, some of you may be experiencing it with me, some of you already have, and some of you still have a way to go before it hits you. It's often joked about, 'you're only turning 25, you're still so young there's nothing to be worried about'. And sure, that's true, but it sure doesn't feel that way.
In my last month of being 24, I find myself stressing and worrying and overthinking about my life so far, my future, what I have and haven't achieved, what I should've by now, and comparing myself to everyone else. I'll be straight up with you - teenage me had two ideas of what life would be like at this age. The first, I didn't even know if I'd make it. The second, stable and successful in a career, graduated uni, proper relationship, my own place, the works.
Instead, I'm still confused about what I'm doing with my life, where I'm going with my future, how I'm gonna get there, never had a relationship, still working towards my degree, and living at home. I've had my setbacks, my anxiety was so bad I was scared of leaving the house or even ordering food myself for a few years, and while that's definitely improved my anxiety still takes a massive toll on me. I struggle with trusting people which effects my relationships, and I have a tendency to procrastinate and self-sabotage.
But it's not all bad. I've found looking back on the positive steps and progress I've made really helps me to see that it's important not to get caught up in an imaginary timeline on your life. Everyone does things at their own pace, when it's right for them. I've started to become more confident in myself. I got over my fear of driving last year and finally got my license and my first car. I got out of my comfort zone and started getting out more and made some amazing friends and memories. I'm no longer as anxious about talking to strangers or doing things by myself. I've got a good, stable job that I enjoy and I'm looking at moving out soon. And I'll finally have my degree at the end of the year. I have an idea of what I want to do with my life, and while I may not have achieved all of this by the time I wanted, I've done it nonetheless.
I guess the point of this post is really that while reaching my quarter century is honestly terrifying to me, I've got to look at the positives and realise how far I've come. Turning 25 is scary, but it's also exciting. And it's true, I am still young and I have so much time to achieve the things I want to achieve. Instead of stressing and freaking out about it, I need to relax and appreciate where I'm at now and look forward to the future and all it's got in store for me!
xx Chontelle
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